A $90 Lesson and Defining Roles

I LOVE opportunities to be humbled (since "God gives grace to the humble"!), and I had another one today.

The house seemed cold this morning, and when I checked the thermostat at about 7:30 it was only at 60 degrees. We keep it cold at night, so I figured it was still warming up. At 8:30, it was still at 60 degrees, so I went down to check the furnace. The first thing I did was to pull out the furnace filter and put in a new one. I hadn't changed the filter in a while, and it was really dirty (it's been really cold this week). Actually, when I saw how dirty it was, I kicked myself for not changing it earlier. I've been really busy lately and spacey too. I looked at the list of "what to do before you call the repairman" and checked off each thing: make sure the "on" switch is on, make sure the furnace filter is clean, make sure vents to the outside are free of ice (had to go outside to check that). The furnace is less than five years old. I figured the problem was minor. Then I checked the diagnostic red and green lights and found out that the issue was with the primary limit. Hmmm...something told me that primary limits could become "limited" by a dirty filter. I pulled the furnace sides apart looking everywhere for this "primary limit". I even read the owners manual, but it seems that the primary limit is in a special place where only expensive repairmen can find it. After trying everything I could think of, I called Will and asked if we could get a repairman in. The repairman came this afternoon and confirmed my suspicions. The filter got too dirty and switched off the primary limit. Somehow, he was able to find the afore-mentioned switch and, after some interesting pounding from the basement, he came back up to present the $90 bill. (I'm guessing that he probably was just sitting down there banging on the wall and putting in the recommended time to appear as though he had "fixed" something) : ). But, all is well. The bill is paid. The furnace is fixed. I am humbled. I'm thinking that God knew the repairman needed some Christmas money.

Now, on to the matter of defining roles. You see, I have changed the furnace filter for the past four years (very regularly). But every time I change the filter I think kind thoughts toward Will because I really believe this is his job. I consider myself doing a good deed--helping him out since he is a busy man. I've never really considered changing the furnace filter my job in the marriage. So this morning, when the filter was dirty, I didn't immediately blame myself, I blamed him. : ) I don't ultimately think I'm responsible for this task; I just fill in when needed. I have this same attitude toward several other tasks around the house, mostly ones that my dad always did (taking out the trash, changing the oil, shoveling the driveway). These things are an act of love that I do for Will. In his mind, though, I'm guessing that he sees me doing these things as me taking on that role in our marriage. We probably need to talk. : )