Suspecting Ourselves

This is from Dave Harvey's book When Sinners Say "I Do": Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage:

It is very important in our Christian lives to be suspicious of any claims to righteousness we bring to our relationship with God. It is in Christ alone, and in his merit alone, that we trust. True humility is living confident in Christ's righteousness, and suspicious of our own.
The word "suspicion" often gets a bad rap. An ominous cloud hangs over it--it's nearly always negative. People in custody are suspicious. Gangs at night are suspicious. Smiling children around empty cookie jars are suspicious. Christians should not be suspicious. Or should we?
Let's backtrack down the road of your last conflict. She said something; he did something. Things went wrong--happens all the time. When we seek to address difficulties in our marriage, does a humble suspicion of our hearts influence our assumptions and approach?
This may be a shocker, but we should be suspicious...selectively, permanently, and internally. As the worst of sinners, in the day-to-day conflicts of marriage, I should be primarily suspicious and regularly suspicious of myself! To be suspicious of my own heart is to acknowledge two things: that my heart has a central role in my behavior, and that my heart has a permanent tendency to oppose God and his ways.
This is an area where you have to train yourself. The humility of a healthy self-suspicion definitely does not come naturally. It's always a low road--safe and secure, but not exactly the scenic highway. And sadly, it's often the less-traveled road in marriage.
When you're in a conflict with your spouse, or evaluating a past conflict, have you ever said (aloud or to yourself), "God knows my heart in this situation"? Was that a comforting or reassuring thought? Did you imagine that a divine examination of your deepest motives and desires would uncover nothing but the purest and most Christ-like intentions? If so, you were on a dangerous stretch of road with no guardrail at all, and probably well on your way to hurtling down into the bottomless canyon of self-deception. We're talking crash and burn. But to live suspicious of your heart's motivations, that's safe spiritual driving.